


pick your love up off the floor

by orphan_account



Category: McElroy Vlogs & Podcasts RPF
Genre: Drunk Texting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Lots of Angst, M/M, in the second chapter especially so watch out, someone please hold nick, talk of verbal and emotional abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-20
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-21 06:56:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10680054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Griffin receives a series of worrying drunk texts from Nick.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i saw some prompts going around and.. these were honestly just too tempting. this is also the longest thing I've ever written so cheers to that haha, enjoy <3

The fact that Griffin was getting a text so late at night was weird in itself. The fact that the text was from one Nick Robinson, though, was weirder.

 

Sure, they had their nights, staying up and texting, sending stupid memes and pictures, but this was different. This was unprovoked, and it was a rapid-fire series of texts, each one worrying Griffin more than the last.

 

[ 2:45 AM ] Nick: fu ck you  for hurting me

[ 2:45 AM ] Nick: i fukcing miss yo u

[ 2:51 AM ] Nick: even when i'm durnk ic ant sotp thinking about oyu

 

Griffin's immediate reaction upon seeing the first text was panic. Did he do something wrong without realizing? Was there something he’d said or done that could've possibly caused a spree of drunken, heart-broken texts from his best friend? Well, of course not. So naturally, his second reaction was confusion, followed by a heavy dose of worry.

 

[ 2:52 AM ] Griffin: Nick? Buddy?

[ 2:52 AM ] Griffin: Are you alright man??

[ 2:54 AM ] Griffin: I didn't do anything wrong right?

 

And the response was almost immediate.

 

[ 2:54 AM ] Nick: sgit. fuck. i'm sorry griff wrong number

[ 2:54 AM ] Nick: sorry if i woke yuo

[ 2:54 AM ] Nick: i'm fine

 

The other's words only spiked Griffin's fear; the same anxiety that had him texting back at breakneck speed.

 

[ 2:55 AM ] Griffin: Where are you right now? Are you alone? Are you safe?

 

[ 2:56 AM ] Nick: idk. some shitty park close to tge hotel. i'm alone but i'm alrihgt

 

Griffin received another short series of texts seconds into typing his next reply.

 

[ 2:56 AM ] Nick: csn you plwase come get me

[ 2:57 AM ] Nick: i'm sorry

 

[ 2:57 AM ] Griffin: Of course bud don't apologize. Stay where you are I'm coming to get you 

 

[ 2:58 AM ] Nick: tgank you griff

[ 2:58 AM ] Nick: you're so good to me

 

Only giving that reply one quick glance, Griffin was out the door within moments. 

 

The Polygon gang had decided to meet up for the week at their headquarters in New York. Not for any reason in particular, but nobody was about to complain. It was a good time for everyone so far; lots of laughs were had, many memorable moments caught on and off camera, it had just generally been a good time. They were nearing the end of the week, though, and some of the members of the crew were struck with pre-departure sadness. None of them wanted to leave, to go their separate ways, yet again. Trips like these were few and far in between.

 

Some people dealt with the sadness by being more affectionate towards and interactive with their co-workers while they still had the chance, and others let it stew silently. Nick's decision, apparently, was to get drunk. At least, that's what Griffin had safely assumed after the conversation the two of them just shared.

 

Thinking back on it, Griffin realized Nick had mentioned going out on his own for awhile, just needing some alone time. They all respected it of course, but now Griffin cursed himself for not offering to go with - he, of all people, knew that Nick wasn't the absolute greatest with just a drink and his own emotions.

 

The thoughts vanished from Griffin's mind as he parked his car along the road before getting out and looking around for his friend. Nick wasn't all that hard to find, though - just look for the man sitting at a bench, face lit up by a phone screen. Griffin cautiously made his way over to Nick, announcing his arrival with a small clear of his throat, before sitting next to him.

 

"Hey, buddy.." Griffin's arm reached out to wrap around Nick's shoulders as he spoke, the man still not turning to face him, not looking away from his screen. "Hey. Are you sure you're alright, man? You ready to head ho-"

 

His words were cut off abruptly by the jarring movement of his friend whipping around to cling to him, face pressed to Griffin's chest as he began sobbing. If the man in question wasn't Nick, this display would've been pitiful to him. Almost pathetic, not that he'd ever say that aloud. But it  _ was _ Nick. It  _ was _ his best friend, and he'd never seen him so broken over something. So destroyed, and sobbing  _ so _ violently.

 

Griffin immediately responded by wrapping his arms around Nick and pulling him in closer, now resting his chin atop his head. He gave it a few minutes before he even attempted to speak, and the sobs wracking the poor man's body still hadn't calmed.

 

"Nick, Nick, bud..." Comforting words. It was really all he could say as he rubbed the other's back, face turning to bury in his hair.

 

"I'm sorry." Came a weak, shaken reply, muffled by Griffin's own chest. "I'm so sorry, Griff, you shouldn't have to deal with this. Shouldn't have to deal with me right now. Told myself I wouldn't fuckin'  _ do _ this, not here. Not with you,  _ fuck _ ." Some of the words were slurred, but it was obvious Nick was making his best attempt to seem as though he wasn't as drunk nor broken as he truly was.

 

Griffin could only nod, whisper to his friend that it was alright, there was no need to apologize, that he'd be here for him no matter what. It was another few minutes of Nick sniffling and taking deep breaths against Griffin's chest before he was finally calm. At least enough to make sense, leaning away from the other but still remaining pressed to him, just so he could speak.

 

"My partner broke up with me." Nick began slowly, softly. "Last week. Just before this trip."

 

"Shit.. I'm sorry, dude, why'd she do it?"

 

There were a few seconds of silence after that, and at first Griffin thought the other hadn't heard, before he finally spoke up. "He," Nick clarified hesitantly, avoiding Griffin's gaze once again. Quickly, he continued before the other man had a chance to grill him about his newly announced sexuality.

 

"And it's- it's really fine. I'm much better off without him. He was shitty. I just... miss him." He explained in a weak tone, now looking up at Griffin with a pained expression.

 

"Wha? Dude, why do you miss him if he was that bad? Why'd you even  _ stay _ with him?"

 

Nick audibly sucked in a breath at that, and it was obvious he was choosing his words carefully, not having prepared for this question. It was some more time before he spoke.

 

"He reminded me of you, to a point."

 

It was short, and it was blunt. The statement hadn't even fully processed in Griffin's mind before Nick continued.

 

"I wanted you, but I couldn't have you. I've been thinking about you for so  _ fucking _ long, I settled for him, no matter how terribly he treated me. I just wanted to believe it was you, Griffin. I miss him because he was the closest I had to you. The closest I could  _ ever _ get.." Eventually, he trailed off. He didn't dare speak another word until Griffin said something, anything.

 

The speech echoed in Griffin's mind, playing on repeat as he tried to process it, tried to connect dots,  _ anything _ to make the immense guilt pooling in his stomach vanish. Nick had put himself through hell just because Griffin was too dense, too oblivious to see that Nick was crushing on him. All the hints were  _ there _ , and he felt fucking awful.

 

"Christ, Nick..." He eventually breathed out, his hands raising to hold the other's face, Nick's breath catching in his throat at the action. " _ God _ , Nick, don't put yourself through that ever again. You don't deserve that, you deserve so much better. So much better than even  _ me _ ." He spoke with sincerity.

 

Nick couldn't help but give a weak laugh, leaning into the other man's affections.

 

"I've been in love with you for so long, Griffin. So fucking long, and I adore everything about you. You make me feel like my heart is fucking melting every time I think about you, so don't you  _ dare _ say I deserve better than you, because I really don't. I'm lucky enough as it to have you as a colleague, let alone a fucking  _ friend _ . You're the goddamn light of my life, dude, don't downplay yourself." 

 

Griffin gave a small laugh of his own, not noticing the tears pooling in his eyes until it was too late, and now  _ he _ was the one crying.

 

"You should've told me, man. God, I'm such a fucking shit friend for not realizing." He said with a hint of bitterness towards himself in his tone, squeezing his eyes shut as he pressed their foreheads together. "You should've fucking told me." 

 

And before anything else could be said, he was kissing Nick. 

 

Shocked, Nick felt himself reeling before the thumb stroking his cheek grounded him once again, and he was kissing back. It was just as good as he always assumed it would be, just as perfect.  _ Griffin _ was perfect. The kiss was just as Nick always dreamed as well; soft, slow, sweet, accompanied by small noises from the both of them as they worked one another out, became comfortable with the shape of their bodies together and the feeling of their mouths combined.

 

Remembering to breathe, Nick broke the contact first, beaming dizzily at his friend. He looked absolutely lovestruck, and Griffin couldn't help but gasp at the sight, an accompanying smile slipping onto his own face. It was a few moments before either of them said a word or made a move, comfortable in the silent gazing, the unspoken words.

 

“I’m sorry,” Griffin breathed out finally, though the smile now adorning his lips betrayed him. Nick was quick to shake his head.   
  


“No, no, don’t be. I’m- I got too fuckin’ drunk, too fuckin’ emotional real quick. ‘M sorry I dragged you out here because of my stupid drama, but…” And he swallowed, fully aware of how close their faces still were. “Thank you.”

 

“I love you.” Griffin said suddenly, the words soft and genuine, and it caught Nick off guard again. He wasn’t sure what to say or do, but the sincerity was there. It was plain in the other’s voice. “I really do,” he reiterated, reluctantly leaning away now. “Let’s get you home, yeah? You’re a mess.”

 

Nick nodded, stumbling with the help of Griffin from the park bench to the car.

 

The ride back was silent aside from the soft buzz of the radio. It wasn’t uncomfortable, though; their silences never were, and Nick was thankful that was the case even now. The kiss hadn’t changed a thing. Their lives and their friendship weren’t over.

 

Their shared hotel room was silent as well when they entered. It was a good thing everyone visiting decided on only two people sharing a room at once. Nick wasn’t sure what he’d do if anyone caught him like this - drunk, face puffy from crying, and staring practically heart-eyed at his best friend with every step they took into the living space.

 

“We should get you some water and get you to bed, okay, bud?” Griffin stated, turning to Nick once the door was closed, and they were alone again. Nick agreed silently, choosing to move to the bed on his side of the room instead of replying. He was met not long after by the still concerned face of Griffin and a bottle of water, which he took with a small smile and a thanks.

 

Griffin sat at the edge of the bed as Nick drank from the bottle and eventually got comfortable under the covers, letting his eyes fall closed with a short sigh.

 

“Again, Griff, about tonight..” Nick began, but was almost immediately cut off, opening his eyes.

 

“Like I said, no apology necessary.” Griffin assured. “Fuck the dude that hurt you, Nick, seriously. You don’t gotta settle for someone like him again.”

 

The statement seemed to hint at something else, and it confused Nick. Made his stomach twist, but he knew not to get his hopes up. Griffin seemed to notice this, but didn’t clarify.

 

“Get some sleep now, alright? We’ll talk in the morning when you’re sober.”

 

Following his words, Nick was greeted with the all-too familiar feeling of fingers in his hair, traveling through the strands slowly, only this time it felt… right. It felt everything like Griffin, and he was leaning into the touch before he could stop himself, sleep already beginning to embrace him once his eyes closed again.

 

Another quiet declaration of love fell from his lips as he eventually passed out, and Griffin was almost happy Nick wasn’t awake to see the way those words turned his face red, nor the way it made him smile like he was in high school all over again.

  
“I love you too, Nick.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nick finally opens up about his previous relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings for talk of abuse in this - nothing super descriptive, but it's there nonetheless

‘ _ Fuck. _ ’

 

That was the first thing immediately popping into Nick’s head upon waking up the next morning. He was hungover as shit, and he could tell he got  _ real _ fuckin’ wasted the previous night.

 

‘ _ Fuck. _ ’

 

Giving an extended groan, he propped himself up on his elbow to rub at his eyes, before he picked up his phone. It was a moment before his vision cleared, squinting at the screen until he could fully comprehend the texts displayed.

 

[ 4:29 AM ] Blocked Number: lmao

[ 4:29 AM ] Blocked Number: good

[ 4:32 AM ] Blocked Number: I already told you all I have to say about you

[ 4:35 AM ] Blocked Number: can you just accept that it’s done and move on? I don’t care about you

[ 5:06 AM ] Blocked Number: I never did. you were barely tolerable

 

Nick felt his breath catch in his throat.  _ Shit _ . So he really  _ did _ end up resending those texts, except this time to the right person. Great.

 

A shaky sigh escaped him as he dropped his phone to the hotel floor, choosing instead to lay back in the bed and drape his arms over his eyes. The window curtain was pulled open, and it was way too damn sunny for this shit.

 

It was only then that he noticed the man next to him;  _ Griffin _ . Next to him. Laying in bed next to him.  _ Facing him _ .

 

He jerked back in surprise at the sight, and it was apparently enough to wake the drowsy man in question.

 

“Mmh.. Nick? What time is it?” Griffin asked softly, remembering and minding his buddy’s hangover as he rubbed a hand over his face. His expression changed upon seeing the freaked out and somewhat hurt one of his friend. “Yo, you alright? Did something happen?”

 

“You’re in bed with me,” Nick blurted without missing a beat, though he cursed himself the moment the words slipped from his lips. Smooth. “Not that I have a problem with it. I, uh.. I was just surprised, that’s all. Sorry.”

 

He let another sigh fall from his lips then, exhausted, and chose instead to rest his head on Griffin’s chest. Griffin, of course, not minding one bit.

 

“Shit, sorry, dude.” Griffin spoke almost sheepishly. “I just… didn’t wanna leave you alone. In case you woke up, or somethin’.”

 

Nick gave an understanding nod at that, letting out a huff of a laugh. “Thank you.”

 

As a silence fell over them, Griffin let his hand move to rest in Nick’s hair, his fingers drifting softly. Nick allowed it, too; he let out the smallest satisfied hum.

 

“I’m sorry about last night, too.” Griffin piped up in the midst of the calm.

 

It was Nick’s turn to be confused. He shifted his head up to look at the other. “What do you mean?”

 

“Sorry for kissin’ you.”

 

Nick went rigid at the words, expression falling quickly. Was the kiss a mistake? Did Griffin only do it to shut him up?

 

Seeing Nick’s panic, Griffin was quick to clarify.

 

“I just mean- you were drunk. Like,  _ real  _ drunk, bud. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I should have brought you home ‘n’ straight to bed.”

 

Nick swallowed, giving a small nod now. He understood, but the seemingly logical part of his brain still told him Griffin regretted it wholeheartedly.

 

“I feel like I took advantage of you,” Griffin continued. “And that’s the  _ last _ thing I want to do, Nick, I mean it. I care about you so fuckin’  _ much _ , it just  _ hurt _ to see you like that. I needed to do something to show you how much you mean to me, but… I still shouldn’t have done that. There was plenty of time for me to kiss you while you were sober. There still is.”

 

The reassuring words of the other, the comforting tone, eased Nick greatly. He melted against Griffin yet again, feeling a flush rise to his face. He was at a complete loss for words now, and could only breathe out another laugh, which quickly turned into a genuine one.

 

Despite being confused, Griffin simply grinned down at Nick and waited for him to speak.

 

“That’s.. really fuckin’ cute.” He finally laughed out, gazing up at the other. “You’re so fuckin’  _ sweet _ , Griffin, I don’t know what the hell I did to  _ ever  _ deserve you.” And he leaned up to press a gentle kiss to Griffin’s lips. It was light, soft - barely there. Almost as if he didn’t want to ruin whatever was happening by making it something more.

 

As Nick pulled away, Griffin’s face grew concerned again.

 

“I’m real sorry if this is bothersome, but, uh… You absolutely sure you’re good? You looked like you’d seen a dang  _ ghost _ when I woke up, and I’m sure that wasn’t just from seeing me in bed with you.” Griffin prodded carefully, his arms now wrapping around Nick to pull him in closer.

 

Nick gave a heavy sigh. He knew he couldn’t keep it all from Griffin, especially if their actions were to escalate into something more serious than what they had now. Griffin would never force it out of him, he knew that well, but he also knew he  _ physically couldn’t _ keep it from him. It was something he wanted to say, and something he had to say. He just needed to find the courage.

 

“Can I.. tell you what happened? Between my ex and I?” He questioned hesitantly, of course receiving an encouraging nod from Griffin without delay. So he sighed, shifting his position so that he could look at him as he spoke.

 

“We started dating almost a year ago now. He was nice at first. Great, in fact. When I said he reminded me of you, I just meant.. I meant in how incredibly sweet you are to me. How perfect you make me feel. He knew when I was upset, and knew exactly how to make it all better. Just like you.”

 

He took a short breath before he continued.

 

“But dating him… that was a different story entirely. He got mean, and hurtful, and pissed off real easily. Started to let me know it was my fault, too, that he was the way he was. Like I said, he knew exactly how to make me feel better, but at the same time he also knew how to make me feel fuckin’  _ miserable _ .” A bitter laugh was forced out of Nick’s throat at that. He needed to finish this story quickly; he could feel his resolve crumbling to dust by the second.

 

“He never laid a hand on me. It was all just.. verbal and emotional torture. Sometimes I wish it  _ was _ physical, though.” He swallowed. “Sometimes I feel like hitting me or- or some shit would’ve been  _ better _ than the way he fuckin’ made me feel. I feel like then I’d have a  _ real _ reason to be complaining about him, too.”

 

Nick’s gaze drifted from Griffin’s at the last statement. He knew he was losing himself. His voice was shaky, and his hands trembled as he spoke, messing carefully with Griffin’s shirt to try and distract himself. The tears pricking at his eyes were hard to ignore, but still he blinked them away.

 

He missed the flash of anger that passed through Griffin’s eyes, the way he seethed briefly at Nick’s words, the knowledge of what the bastard did to him slowly sinking in.

 

“What the  _ fuck _ .” Was what he finally said, anger plain in his voice. Nick definitely didn’t miss that, even flinched away from it.

 

Immediately apologetic, Griffin shook his head and took a moment to breathe.

 

“Nick,  _ God _ , I’m so sorry. He sounds like a real fuckin’ asshole,  _ Christ _ .”

 

Nick looked at him again. It was obvious he’d need a moment, but the fact that Griffin was so upset  _ for _ him made him feel fuzzy. It made him feel loved.

 

“There’s nothing anyone can do now.” He pointed out with a half-hearted shrug.

 

“But-  _ Nick _ , you don’t deserve that! You deserve  _ so _ much fuckin’ better, I can’t believe that asshole  _ did _ that do you. It’s good you got away from him.” Griffin eventually huffed, but his expression softened yet again. Right here and right now, this was about Nick.

 

“... Are you alright, Nick? I mean- dumb question, I know, but…”

 

Griffin didn’t even need to finish before Nick nodded, his face breaking out in a smile. 

 

“I’m feeling better, yeah. Especially with you here.” And Griffin smiled back.

 

“Thank you, Griff. I meant it, thank you so fuckin’ much. For everything. I know I don’t say it nearly enough, but you’re important to me.” Nick spoke sincerely, letting out a final shaky sigh. He meant what he said; just talking to Griffin was making him feel better about it all. Opening up to the man finally, it felt freeing. It felt right. He knew the effects of his previous relationship would always be settled in the back of his mind, but with Griffin, they were easy to forget.

 

“I know, bud. You’re important to me too, and you know it. And hey?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I love you.”

 

It was the same phrase that echoed in Nick’s dream as he slept the night before, except they were now in his face, and they were real. They were being spoken to him by Griffin, and they instantly brought a flush to his cheeks, as well as what he’s sure was the stupidest, most puppy-love smile imaginable.

 

“I love you too. I really fuckin’ do.” Nick responded, his sober lips reaching the other’s full-force this time. It was better than their first kiss; just as soft, but this time around full of meaning. Full of purpose, and Nick knew he would chase that purpose to the ends of the earth as long as Griffin was right there alongside him.

 

Pulling away, Griffin couldn’t help but laugh, another kiss reaching Nick’s nose before he turned onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. Still not looking at the other, he spoke. “So, how’s that hangover treating you? You ready to go get breakfast ‘n’ see the others? You sure as fuck worried them by not telling anyone where you went or if you got back home safe.”

 

Nick groaned. He was  _ not _ ready for the questions, especially not if he knew he’d be gazing at Griffin with the most ‘disgustingly in love’ look for the rest of the trip, which would only prompt the worst from their friends.

 

“Simone is gonna know _ exactly _ what’s up, Griffin. I’m not ready for that,” he whined, and Griffin took pity on him, tussling his own hair with an amused laugh before forcing himself out of the bed.

 

“We’ll eat on our own first. Tell ‘em we’ll be late, yeah?” He complied, grinning over at a bedraggled and still slightly hungover Nick.

 

“Perfect.” He sighed, satisfied, and pulled himself out of bed as well.

 

This was going to be an interesting journey, and a tough one at that. The distance between them would be unbearable, but they both knew they could power through it; they always did. That’s just how they worked, and they worked so damn well together. 

 

Nick had faith in it. He had faith in Griffin. 

  
He knew that whatever was about to unfold would happen exactly as it was meant to, and he was ready for it. They both were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHAH finally finished! hope you guys enjoyed it! 
> 
> I was requested to write a 'companion piece' talking more about nick's ex + what he did to him SO i thought I might as well just write a second chapter! it was super fun to do, I love workin' with these boys.. 
> 
> feel free to send fic requests, prompts, or just ideas in general to my tumblr, shipboysinc ! <3

**Author's Note:**

> this is the song the title came from btw !  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjEqAZoBYwI  
> only the main course of the song is fitting, really
> 
>  
> 
> OH HEY! sobstoriez here on ao3 drew me some adorable art *v*  
> [Click Here!](http://imgur.com/a/xRlBX)


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